Extramarital relationships are rather a common sight these days. Men have extramarital affairs at a higher percentage than women. Extramarital affairs, like termites, are damaging countless relationships and marriages due to temptations like adultery and infidelity. Infidelity has a detrimental effect on up to 40% of married couples. Men are more likely to stray than women (Dr. Fran Walfish, family and relationship psychotherapist).
Despite the fact that both men and women cheat, studies show that men are more likely than women to admit to having affairs. It is worth noting that, psychologically, most men do not cheat with the same intent as women. Nonetheless, data suggests that men are more prone to cheat than women, with 20% of men admitting to infidelity compared to 13% of women.
How common is cheating?
According to a New York Times article, 15% of married women and 25% of married men have engaged in extramarital relationships. When emotional and sexual relationships without intercourse are taken into account, the incidence rises by roughly 20%. Extramarital affairs can be seen in people of all ages, wealth, and socioeconomic status. It simply targets the flaws in a couple's relationship and puts them at risk.
Why men cheat?
Married individuals cheat for a variety of reasons. Personality problems and childhood difficulties, as well as opportunities like social media and a lack of boundaries, can all increase the probability that one of these causes will lead to an affair. Men do not cheat because they are dissatisfied or unhappy with their lives. Men cheat because they believe they can get away with it and, perhaps more significantly, because they are willing to allow themselves to do so.
Boredom
Men who are seeking the thrill of the chase and the thrill of renewed love are more inclined to cheat. Some men indulge in extramarital relationships solely to escape the monotony of their married lives. Cheating could provide adventure in a mundane and uninteresting life, as well as a convenient escape for such people. Instead of seeking ways to charge their marriage, some men find it simpler to shift authority or primacy to another relationship and feel the spark outside to be an exciting choice. It becomes a current moment for satisfaction rather than the difficult task of resolving a problem in their marriage. Boredom was cited by 71% of unfaithful men as the cause for acting on sexual temptation.
Unhappiness or dissatisfaction
Marriage dissatisfaction, either emotionally or sexually, is frequent. For both men and women, a sexless marriage is frequently identified as the main cause. Adultery is frequently the result of their lack of action in bed. This causes physical dissatisfaction in marriage, prompting men to engage in a non-committal extramarital relationship.
Revenge
If the woman has had an affair or has caused the man to suffer in some manner, the aggrieved spouse may feel compelled to seek revenge, which may lead to an affair. To take revenge, he may cheat. He is enraged with his companion and wishes to harm her. The infidelity is supposed to be noticed and recognised in such instances. Because he wants his spouse to know about his infidelity, the man does not lie or conceal his affair. Even though their wives are guilty and accept their extramarital affairs, some men persist in their dishonesty. This is typically done by men who refuse to forgive their wives.
Lack of commitment
People who are less dedicated to their relationship are more likely to cheat, according to a 2018 study. He could mistake the neurochemical surge of early passion with love, misunderstanding the distinction between romantic intensity and long-term affection. It's also possible to really adore someone but be hesitant to commit to them. In this instance, one spouse may cheat in order to avoid having to commit, even though they would prefer to continue the relationship.
Get validation in life
Men are usually drawn to younger, more attractive women. Dating a younger lady might enhance his self-esteem compared to living with an ageing spouse who is unconcerned about her appearance and self-image. This new company has the potential to make him feel unique and to entice him into a hot and exciting relationship. For men, the thrill and excitement serve to break up the routine of life, and they enjoy it. Men have affairs because every new "conquest" gives them the illusion that they are the most magnificent. It's nice to be regarded as desirable and appealing by others, even if it's not in the marriage. It has the ability to make a man feel powerful and attractive.
Substance use
He may have a long-term issue with alcohol or drugs, which influences his decision-making and leads to unfortunate sexual choices. Or he could have a condition like sexual addiction, in which he engages in sexual thoughts and actions obsessively as a means to numb himself and escape life.
Feeling unappreciated
One frequent thread is a sense of being underappreciated and not adequately cared for in the relationship. Infidelity might result from a sense of being devalued or ignored. When a man does not feel appreciated in his marriage, he looks for affection elsewhere. It is frequently noticed that a woman is preoccupied with balancing her personal and professional obligations. She may overlook or disregard her spouse in such situations, or she may take him for granted. Furthermore, she may unintentionally reject him or undervalue his worth. Hey, keep an eye out for another lady who can connect to them and make them feel special.
Emotional immaturity
If he hasn't had much experience in committed relationships, or if he doesn't completely comprehend that his actions will ultimately have consequences, like as hurting his partner, he may believe that having sexual adventures is acceptable. Men cheat, at least some of the time, because they lack the maturity to devote the time, dedication, and energy necessary to work through underlying difficulties in their marriage. Cheating guys have a clear tendency to be rash. It might be beneficial for men who are considering cheating to think if the affair is worth the risk of hurting or losing the people they profess to love the most.
Insecurity
Many guys may begin to feel old and fear that their days of adventure are numbered. He may believe he is not attractive enough, wealthy enough, intelligent enough, and so on. As a result, men seek a lady who will make them feel youthful and in their prime once more. A man may be attempting to boost his self-esteem. He wants approval from women other than his partner to boost his sagging ego, utilising this sex spark of curiosity to feel needed, desired, and worthwhile.
Selfishness
Someone who cheats may have a problem with empathy. They aren't considering the consequences of their actions on the people they care about, whether it's their partner, children, or the person with whom they've been involved. It's likely that his main concern is for himself and alone himself. As a result, he can lie and keep secrets without feeling guilty or remorse, as long as it gets him what he wants. It's possible he didn't plan to be monogamous in the first place. Rather of seeing his monogamy vow as a gift to and for his relationship, he sees it as something to avoid and work around.
Cheating can occur for a variety of reasons, and marriage is difficult. However, the greatest insurance plans for protecting your marriage include communicating honestly, expressing your needs, practising forgiveness, and making a daily commitment to work on your marriage. For the most part, no one element influences a man's decision to cheat. And a man's motivations for adultery might change as his circumstances change. Other choices include couple's counselling, being open and honest with a partner and striving to repair the relationship, or separation or divorce. A man always has options that do not degrade or potentially damage his integrity or the life he and his significant other have built.
Sources:
https://www.verywellmind.com/why-married-people-cheat-2300656#primary-reasons-for-cheatinghttps://www.bonobology.com/reasons-why-men-have-extramarital-affairs/
https://www.redbookmag.com/love-sex/relationships/advice/a3966/why-men-cheat/
https://www.fatherly.com/health-science/why-happily-married-men-cheat-wives/
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/love-and-sex-in-the-digital-age/201704/13-reasons-why-men-cheat
https://www.marriage.com/advice/relationship/30-experts-explain-reasons-why-men-indulge-in-cheating/#How_common_is_cheating